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The Gap
Reviews

From: Crap
Category: Other stuff
Date: 07 January 2003

Review

Was looking for some clothes, usual specifications of the prematurely middle-aged man, the three ws: wearable, washable, and without logos or patterns. So was forced into the Gap, exploitative, dead, boring, unfashionable, middle of the road, evil, crap, gap. You can't get normal clothes anywhere beside gap or uniqclo. The other stores are a joke. Muji's prententious. I am being cheap this year, therefore decided to buy all my clothes on sale. A disgusting 99p deli burger king and five gaps later along Oxford street and around , I am familiar with all their merchandise: the cotton sweaters on sale are all extra petite, the trousers have 30 inch waists, or its made of wool and it will be worn once and never handwashed. Things I begin to hate about Gaps, the shop assistants looking bad in gap clothes, the posters of boring unsexy people wearing boring clothes and stripy scarves, the pathetically small amount of sale goods. But as always Capitalism redeems itself and the story must have a happy ending. In the basement (the hierarchy of floors in retailing is a whole nother thesis) in Regent's street gap I find a large heavy washable gray jumper in large for 9.99, I find extra large cotton sweaters for 6.99 in gray and blue. O joy! then summer trousers in exactly my size 35 inch waist 34 inch legs for 9.99( an ugly set of figures). I buy it all without trying anything on. And at home it all fits ok. I look pretty good. Thank you gap, thank you slave labour.

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