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November 27th, 2003  Dr. Phil  Day

From: Jamie Duke
Category: TV
Date: 28 November 2003


Thank you Dr. Phil for talking to the couple who had the abortion during their engagement. Having this kind of story on T.V. was a major move to helping America! I agreed with the need to forgive each other and themselves and appreciate the sensitivity you used. I currently volunteer at a Pregnancy Clinic in Escondido, California and I also help women who have had an abortion, come to a place where they can forgive themselves and others ie...boyfriend, one night stands, husband... What I have found over the years in helping PostAbortive men and women is the grief(that is mingled with guilt)that they feel over the loss of their baby. The couples or singles that have made the choice of abortion, like I had when I was 23, have a very difficult time with the heart of their choice, and that is the loss of a child.

The man who was on the show was feeling so much grief and I believe he also needed to express feelings for the child that is not in his life, but that would take the whole show. I have found that woman who forgive and try to move on but have not connected emotionally with their baby loss are still stuck. So many women feel bad because they can't just move on after forgiving. You know we women are born to nuture and men to protect. When we make the choice to abort we have to shut down those natural insticts to be able to follow through with the abortion. As we help them work through the shame and forgiveness connected with this, then they can face the baby loss and then can truly move on. I know Dr. Phil that this is such a deep issue. Please have more of this. There are millions out here suffering in silence. Thank you so much, Jamie Duke 2190 Gibraltar Glen Escondido Calif. 92029 760-739-1595

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